Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Three Kids And Counting....

JUST kidding! I'm done counting. I had my son The Chunker in November. Punkin' was thrilled that she got a brother. Sweet Pea could care less. Less than less. Sweet Pea steaks his Binky and blankets. She yells when he cries so we will hush him. Punkin' gushes over him every second of every day.

Punkin' is doing wonderful in school this year, however she has found a wide array of new excuses to move slower than molasses during homework time. "Sweet Pea is bothering me because I can hear her breathing in the.next.room." or my personal favorite "I refused to eat breakfast, and threw away my lunch so I'm too hungry to walk so I can't do my homework." WHAT? When did walking have to do with math or spelling?? Seriously, those excuses I couldn't make up if I were to be paid a million dollars a year for life.

Our holiday season was long and hectic. It started with the birth of The Chunker, continued with the Thanksgiving Split. I took the 3 kids to my sisters while Boo Boo spent it with his step-father (as his mother had recently passed). We were fast approaching the Christmas Crunch where Jack the Elf would make an appearance. A different spot every day. My favorite thing to remember to do in the middle of the night. I'm bleary eyed and dazed as I nurse The Chunker when I remember Jack! Crap I think. After this boob I'll get up and move him. Cut to the next day when I'm trying to distract Punkin' and Sweet Pea so I can quickly move Jack the Elf. (I'd like to take this time to personally thank my mother for this responsibility.)

As Christmas Day neared and I again adjusted to loosing sleep for my babies, I began to *function* and move Jack nightly. He is a wonderful Elf who is supposed to keep my children in line during the Christmas Crunch. He.Doesn't.Work. Instead he plays games. The Christmas Crunch has passed. We moved into a New Year with new beginnings and old gripes. Sweet Pea touches Punkin'. Punkin' hates that. She also hates staying home sick, which she had to do again this year. Thank you strep throat, I love it when you make repeat appearances in my household.

I went back to work and miss my nightly nuzzle with the kids. I miss dinner time. I miss snuggle time. I miss bedtime. I miss Boo Boo, Punkin', Sweet Pea and The Chunker. I also love every second I have with them. I will always love every second I have with them. <3

Thursday, August 4, 2011

The Land of Birthdays

Well, here it is. It happens every year. It came and went last year, and now its back, only this year exponentially worse. The Land of Birthdays. It started earlier this year....before my birthday. How the HECK did that happen? While Boo Boo is the best father any mother could ask to get paired with, he blessed me with a birthday to plan every other month from fall until spring. I think its a conspiracy. I asked for summer babies...I got winter babies. I didn't think I could be clearer when I said "I want my kids to have outdoor parties, so they have to be born in the summer. NO WINTER BABIES." Don't get me wrong, I love my kids. All of them. I even got a bonus daughter.

But planning indoor parties is the worst ever. Period. That means sand, dirt, snow in my house. Or shelling out my uterus for an indoor location; neither of which I want to do. So I got an email reminding me that Punkin's birthday is just 2 months away. Thank you junk mail. Thank you for thinking I'm so irresponsible I don't remember when my kids birthday's are. Thank you also for coming into my email just as I was checking it with Punkin'. Now the planning begins. "Mom on September 26, you have to throw me the best party EVER! Its going to be Hello Kitty cuz she's my favorite." What? You don't own ANYTHING Hello Kitty, when did she become your favorite??? "Now. I want a Hello Kitty party, with cupcakes. NOT a regular cake. Got it?" Yea I got 'it' alright. That was yesterday.

Today, she decided that not I, but her Grandmother would plan the best party ever. Sadly, Grandma's don't plan parties anymore. Nor do we have parties on a school day. So you my dear will have a party before your actual birthday. That did not float Punkin's boat at all. Until I told her that Sweet Pea didn't even get a birthday party at all when she turned 1. Punkin' got the choice of either having a party the weekend before (or after) but not on her actual birthday, or not having one at all. She made a good choice, but not before trying to bargain. She bargained that even if we have her party on a different day, Boo Boo and I would still make her actual birthday the best day ever. She would wake up and feel taller that day, then she would find a surprise in her room and I would make her breakfast just the way she liked it before going to school. At school she would have a surprise party then come home to more surprises. Great, she's in fantasy land and her poor heart will be broken by me again when I tell her school won't throw her a surprise party....awesome.

So here it is. August 4 and I am planning a birthday for the end of September. Don't forget, I can do it again every other month! So in November, instead of planning a birthday this year, I will be giving birth...so next year November doesn't feel left out in this mix. January is Sweet Pea's birthday....I wonder what Punkin' will try to con me into planning for that. The end of the Land of Birthday's is rounded up in March with Boo Boo's birthday. Literally every other month of planning for 7 months of the year. I can do all this, I really can. Even while pregnant, breastfeeding, recovering from giving birth, more breastfeeding. Boy am I lucky? I bet you're jealous. Don't lie. You are. Seriously tho. I am blessed to have a wonderful family. Even if I have to plan my own birthday...

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Wow

It has been a LONG time since I posted. And I apologize. It has also been one LONG ride to get from April until June. We had to put another kink in Punkin's life. We moved to another city, to keep her in the same school system after getting custody of her. Surprisingly, she has adjusted quite well, although over the last few weeks I have heard such comments under the breath as "Being a big sister is really hard" or "Sweet Pea, you are annoying please get out of my room". I suppose that comes with the fact that her sister is +1 and can get into anything she wants....even the top bunk which used to be Punkin's sanctuary. Hers, not mine, not Daddy's....just hers....and now Sweet Pea's.

Punkin' has been a great help since we moved. Loading/unloading the washer/dryer. Making herself breakfast, picking up the toys Sweet Pea has left out. Helping her Daddy out when he is super duper tired from hard manual labor in the sun all day.

School is winding down, and Sweet Pea has been asking every day if I am going to let her do math work over the summer to give to her 2nd grade teacher. Of course I will "let" her do homework over the summer.....my guess is as soon as school is out the idea of math over the summer is fun will fade...rapidly. My mother, however, brought Sweet Pea some math books so she can practice over the summer, and she has been at them non stop since she got them. Even tho she exclaimed something along the lines of "You brought me math books Grandma? I wanted a toy or candy" **Eye Roll**. She is so cool, pretending not to care about school. HA I see through that Sweet Pea!

As a rule of thumb, those with Autism do not routinely show or understand emotions, especially when they are socially awkward like Sweet Pea. I have seen her recently greet her father, her sister, her grandfather, and her grandmother with hugs and or kisses when they come into the house. Unprovoked sometimes, non resistant all the time. That is my saving grace. Even with the mood swings, the move, the sometimes annoyed attitude with Sweet Pea, the unscheduled summer coming up...she is still progressing. <3

Friday, April 8, 2011

Worst Stepmother Award

Yup, I've won the worst stepmother award. According to Punkin' I'm the worst stepmother because I make her follow the rules and do her homework. I make her responsible for herself and her actions. Well sue me. So sorry, but if that is her worst complaint, well Jesus I'm doing something right...aren't I?

I have long suspected it's not me she is mad at. I was right. She came to me and was upset that she hadn't been "allowed" to see her mother. She blamed me, said I wasn't letting her go. Oh how I wish it was that easy. Her Dad and I explained that her mother had not called the last two Sundays. She was livid. I don't blame her. She ranted, she raved, she screamed, she told me "Its because she doesn't know how to be a mother! That's why I live with you and Daddy. You take care of me and I love you Mom!"

I love her too. I hate that she has to go through this. I wish I could smack some sense into her mother. I wish I had any remote clue as to what goes through her mother's head. I wish a sweet 7 year old didn't have to deal with adult problems and emotions. I am thankful that after about 5 minutes of rage, she always calms down. She always hugs me. She always says or signs "I Love You". I love that. I can say the only *blessing* that this is providing is Punkin' is much more responsible.

She is doing the dishes, washing the windows, vacuuming the apartment, helping fix up the new apartment. Today on the way to school I told her I loved her. She asked me to stop saying I love her so much. When I asked why she replied, because you embarrass meee! She then asked if she could walk to class by herself. I shot a glance at Daddy. He made the same face I did. The answer was NO WAY! But I told her she could, but I had to walk her to the front door of the school, its the rule in our house. (Yea I make up rules on the spot....so shoot me). She whined for a half a second, but thought better of that because she knows I would have changed my mind.

The rest of the ride to school she sang and talked to herself about how she could be responsible and walk herself to class. I had a panic attack the rest of the ride. Clearly our emotions are not aligned. I wrestled with my thoughts. What if she got lost? She is 7 and in the 1st grade, so why can't I let her try walking alone? The teacher is going to think we abandoned her...we walk her down every day. If she took the bus, she would walk alone to class. Why is this so hard?

I didn't-ish walk her to class. I walked her into school, got my kiss good bye and followed about 5 feet behind her. She noticed, put her hands on her hip and said "Mom, you said you weren't going to walk me to class today. I'm responsible." Deep breath. I know, you are responsible. I'm going to wait at the office to make sure you go around the corner. *Panic* I did as I promised. I waited by the office until she turned the corner down the hallway......then I followed her. I went to the corner, because I can see her teacher and class from there. I waved at the teacher. Phew, she doesn't think I abandoned my child. Punkin' spotted me and I signed I love you...and waited for the dirty look because I was embarrassing her. Or a worse look for following her. It didn't come! She signed I love you back and I left...still panicking. The panic didn't go away until I was back in the car with Sweet Pea and Hubby. (Its back after typing. I'm thinking about tomorrow....ugh).

What made me smile today? She told me she heard a "uka-lady" in the song we listened to in the car. Yes, a uka-lady instead of a ukulele..

Sunday, March 27, 2011

They call me Sir Farts A Lot

Its been a long time since I blogged. Sorry about that. This week has been up and down with Punkin'. She was extremely upset she did not get a visit with her biological mother, as her mother failed to call. Punkin' was very upset and acted out all week. But along the way she said some funny things.


As some of you may know, we are potty training Punkin' because her mother used Punkin's Autism as an excuse saying "she can never be potty trained". FAIL. She was trained on #1 within a week of trying. #2 she is having some trouble with. Its only been 7 weeks, but I can tell we may need to involve a doctor at some point. Anyhow, I asked her "Punkin' did you have an accident? I smell something." She said "HUH??? NOOO! I did not have an accident!" So of course, I asked if she was sure. Punkin' is quick to respond. "I told you I did not have an accident! I just let out a HUGE fart! Just like at school!" Just like at school? I thought...so I asked "What do you mean just like at school? Do you fart a lot at school?" She giggled. A lot. Then said "Yea, they call me Sir Farts A Lot! And I make noises like this with my mouth...boom psst boom" (her attempt to beat box).

Daddy and I almost DIED laughing!

At the current time she is in the tub. She will be there for about an hour, or until I tell her she can no longer hang out in the bathwater. She's singing. Would you like to know what she is singing? "I'm cleaning my stinky feet! Colin won't go on a date with me if I don't clean my stinky feet! Nobody likes stinky feet!" Yes, she has a "boyfriend" and her father is not so thrilled. Just look at the happy couple....

I must say, despite her acting out multiple times this week, she has been extremely helpful. She has done lots of "challenges" including:
Changing Sweet Pea's stinky diapers
Washing the dishes (including bottles)
Vacuuming the apt
Washing the slider door
Cleaning her room, even tho it was Sweet Pea who made the mess
and she didn't fight over having to do her homework.
Punkin' has been saving her money so she can spend it on toys, games, dolls ect. We as a family have stopped buying her those things unless it is educational and falls during a birthday or Christmas. She is learning how to manage money, and I love it!

Cannot wait to see what next week brings....

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

School Days

Sunday night was game night. Punkin' decided it would be a perfect time to play a video game with Daddy. When bedtime rolled around, I gave her a 5 minute warning. Her reply was super sweet....."Nope! I'm staying up forever, and you have to go to work because you are RUINING game night!"

Wow, ok, I wasn't even mean...what did I do to deserve this??? Oh that's right, usually I work nights so its just Daddy and daughters. So on the night's I am home, I am the wicked witch of the west. Well she got sent to bed after the 5 minutes. She then proceeded to yell for about 30 minutes that she was staying up forever! Then she fell asleep from exhaustion.

Monday morning I woke Punkin' up for school. After many grumbles and groans she declared "IT'S VACATION! I don't have school today!" Of course I told her there are no vacation days in March, that she has vacation in April, which is next month so it's time to get up..... ***more grumbles***

Ah...here we arrive at school. Her teacher asked her how her weekend was. I thought it was a good weekend. She saw her biological mother, her half sister and cousins from her mother's side. She played, she relaxed. What could have been better than that? Boy was I wrong. She told her teacher she had a TERRIBLE weekend. Why was it terrible? Because it was only two days long! At least that didn't affect her behavior at school because she had a great day! :)

I picked her up and watched her walk around our car, not noticing the huge missing bumper from Dad's accident Sunday. I asked her if she had noticed anything different about the car. Nope. Nothings different. Take another walk around, look closely Punkin'. Nope. Nothings different. Look at the front of the car Punkin'. Oh My Gosh! What the heck happened?I explained to her that while she was at her mother's Daddy had an accident. She got in the car with a look of extreme thought. As I started to drive she said (in the most serious tone): Ma do you have a lawyer? I asked why would I need a lawyer? She said well Daddy crashed the car, so you guys need a lawyer to help fix it. I couldn't stop laughing at her. When I finally did she was agitated that I had laughed so hard. I apologized and explained to her that we don't need a lawyer, we have car insurance and that when the car was in the shop getting fixed we would rent a different looking car. She insisted we still need a lawyer.

Good Morning Punkin'! Its Tuesday, time to get up for school! :).... yeah...Punkin' was not as happy as I was this morning! She answered "UGH! AGAIN?" Yes, I told her, you have school Monday - Friday. Today is Tuesday, so including today you have four more days today. To which she so nicely replied "That is ridiculous!" Good thing her tune changed at school...another great day!

Wednesday morning she claims its still vacation and she doesn't know why I keep getting her up so early. I again explained to her that she doesn't have vacation in March it is in April. She thinks I'm full of it. She doesn't believe me. Show her the calendar...yea she still thinks I'm full of it. But another great day! I cannot wait to wake her up tomorrow! Maybe because its St. Patty's Day tomorrow and she gets to wear green she will believe that there is school....lets find out.

I will forever <3 her. She says she loves me because I'm a good mom and I take great care of her, but thinks I kiss and hug her too much. Its because I love Punkin', Sweet Pea and Boo Boo lots n lots forever n ever... <3 <3

Friday, March 11, 2011

More Than You :)

Last Tuesday was Daddy's birthday. Punkin', Sweet Pea and I took him out to dinner....well more like Linner since it was about 3:30 in the afternoon. All day long Punkin' had been looking forward to our date. As soon as I picked her up from school, she asked two things. Where was Daddy? and Is it time for our date at the 99 Restaurant?  I told her Daddy was in the car waiting with Sweet Pea because she was taking a nap and we could go on a date soon.

She rushed out to the car to wish Daddy Happy Birthday! She could not wait for our date. Punkin' was very well behaved, saying please and thank you. Reading and ordering from the menu. We were having a lovely time on Daddy's Birthday Date. Then there it was. The "ism" of the afternoon.

It went like this:

Punkin': Karen, ask me a quest. (quest - short for question)
Me: How much do you love me?
Punkin': Eeehhhh, ask me something else. I don't like that quest.
Me: OK fine. How much do you love Daddy? (I expected the same answer I just got)
Punkin': (without missing a beat) More Than You!  *GRIN*

Assuming Punkin' had hurt my feelings, my Boo Boo tried to apologize to me. I assured him, she only loves him more than me because she has known him longer.  :)